One is (allegedly) the loneliest number: Hello, from the other half of this blog!

Greetings, fellow humans! My name is Shila, and I’m the other half of The Fourth Leaf (and the other half of my relationship with Ryn, respectively.)


I’m not even going to pretend to be as witty or funny (or charming or cute) as Ryn. She is the love of my life, so as far as I’m concerned she’s really the coolest.

I’m the dorky half who knows all the lyrics to Three Dog Night’s Greatest Hits album. (How does YOUR light shine in the halls of Shambala? These are the important questions of our time, people.)

Now that we’ve ensured that I’m not setting your expectations of my posts too high… I’ll tell you a little about me and what I’m going to be talking about.

I am:

  • 30-years- old (and very bad at adulting)
  • A cisgender woman (she/her)
  • Pansexual (and didn’t realize it until I was in my late 20’s)
  • Polyamorous
  • An intersectional feminist (who could definitely be doing more)
  • Divorced from someone who was emotionally abusive
  • Anxious and Depressed
  • About to file for bankruptcy (I told you I’m a bad adult!)
  • A (newly) crazy cat lady
  • Really into creative projects
  • Obsessed with four leaf clovers

Now…. I know what you’re thinking… that Shila is a CATCH! How can I get me some of that?! (The answer, of course, is to get to know me, and if we hit it off, we can totally date because Ryn and I are polyamorous…)

But in seriousness… I’m human. I’m just as flawed and crazy as the next person… and I believe that there is a very special beauty that comes from authenticity. It is what I strive to be more than anything else- it is central to who I am as a person, and central to my relationship with Ryn.

When we imagined what we wanted our blog to be, we wanted to make sure we don’t only represent the ideal parts of our lives. We will of course feature a lot of that- the traveling and the craft projects and all our fur babies- but we also want to talk about the real stuff. We want to talk about our mental illnesses, what being poly is like, how hard it is to get through a relationship with someone who is dealing with a divorce, and so much more… because those are part of our authentic story.

So, stick around a while and get to know us. We’re very excited to share our lives with you, and hopefully it will be fun and inspiring (or you can learn from our mistakes and screw ups. Whichever.)

Authentically yours,


P.S. Contrary to what Three Dog Night may tell you (in a song that I ABSOLUTELY sing at the top of my lungs on occasion), one is not always the loneliest number. If you’re happy being alone, then that is AMAZING- you don’t have to be more than one to be complete! If you are part of two or more and you find yourself lonely, then there’s a problem in your relationship and you should really reconsider why you’re in it. And lastly… “No” is NOT the saddest experience you’ll ever know.


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